are you re-entering too?


Hi there or rather... Hiya – as some say where I was recently traveling,

Hello after some time apart (unless you're Betsy, my mother-in-law, or Nathan, my husband, who are both readers... and hello to Ian, my father-in-law, too – we were all traveling together)!

This is what we were up to for the majority of our trip:

Cassandra sitting on back of canal boat with R hand on tiller, she sits looking out as she pilots, closed locks with algae and plants growing on them are right behind her, photographer has taken shot within cabin so Cassandra is framed by wooden cabin entrance and bright blue skies with puffy clouds.
things not known by just looking at this: it was hot and that bandana is drenched in cold water. those are the locks doors right behind me.

Funny how a picture can be incredibly misleading.

I got the hang of using the tiller and piloting the boat on day 6 (of an 8 day boat trip). So the majority of the trip I was not located at this point nor trusting myself to handle it while Nathan took the picture.

So, to lovingly clear up any confusion, the majority of our trip was spent somewhere on canal boats or walking alongside them to get to the next nearby lock!

It was also spent eating tons of good food, walking around new places, connecting with new-to-me family, and drinking tea (and laughing about – and sometimes with – how most of the British people we met on the other side of the counter did not understand – or want to understand? – how to make an iced tea).

(not pictured: the first two days of massive frustration and overwhelm that I felt– perhaps Nathan, too, but I'll only speak for myself–or the third night and fourth day when I was physically and mentally spent after moving through the process of opening, filling, emptying, and closing a few too many locks)

Oh wait... Nathan did take a (totally consensual) pic of me during my much-needed rest:

Cassandra sits with one leg on ground and one leg bent and up on back end cabinet of canal boat. She is wearing dark clothes and looks a bit glum. the boat is moored and there is greenery behind her as well as another moored canal boat. the sky is overcast.
yeah, it was a gray moment but it didn't last that long (the skies or the mood).

Sayings we embraced:

"Tough times make for great stories" - author unknown, shared by Nathan (he might very well be the author)
"Turn towards the danger" - the canal boat rental employee, she gave me this tidbit to help with understanding the turn of the boat tiller
"Look at that _____!" - all of us, even (or especially??) when someone was doing something that required a lot of concentration 😆
"We can do hard things" - Glennon Doyle

It was an adventure I'm so glad and privileged to have been able to say "yes!" to. And to have adventured along with B, I, and N!


I returned home earlier this week

I gratefully and intentionally handed this week over to re-entry and all that goes with it:

  • physically with unpacking, tidying up the clutter from pre-trip stuff explosions, and reconnecting with my body through yoga;
  • mentally taking a break from newness and sinking deep into the unconscious of dreamland each night,
  • and emotionally checking in and releasing whatever is ready to shed.

If you've been with me for awhile here, you know I'm a sucker for transitions. I am simultaneously fascinated by transitions and consistently struggle with them.

My previous note to you was even about transitions:

overflowing with transition’s presence
The flower known as the fall-blooming anemone (in the header ^) hangs out right along the pathway to my front door. This particular anemone blooms throughout August* and, for the past five years, has helped me transition from late summer to early fall. I moved into this home when I was

The transition of re-entry or 'returning to' is one ripe with so much potential opportunity and upheaval.

I wonder if you are moving through a transition of re-entry, too?

August can be a month full of adventures from home and the calendar just flipped to September, so perhaps you are here, too?

Or maybe you haven't traveled far from home at all lately. Or you traveled somewhere earlier this year and you're (still? yes, still! and that's okay!) experiencing re-entry turmoil?

Maybe you're experiencing some other type of 'returning to.'

Returning to school? Returning to a state of mind you have been away from for awhile? Returning to a relationship?

I share about another thread of re-entry in the podcast episode I released today.

Being apart from Ernest, the dog I call kin, and he being apart from me, has welcomed the chance for a fresh start within our relationship.

Breaking apart and then rejoining – Turning away from and then turning back towards – Disconnecting and then reconnecting – Departing and then re-entering – Tidal ebbs and flows – Sun setting and then rising again – Moon in darkness and then returning to visibility...

In that "hello again" moment, I find it easy to think the 'again' means we're right back where we were before we left.

But the moon isn't actually in the same spot in our sky each time it returns to visibility.

The waters are at different levels each flow.

It's not merely high tide and low tide. Or new moon or visible moon.

You, too, are different each 'again' – each 'returning to.'

I am, too.

The 'we' (our relationship) is, too!

But we can't get to that different 'again' without the departure, without the leaving. Those departures may be self-selected. I've also experienced many departures that are chaotically or calmly beyond my control. I imagine you have, too, especially over these recent years.

As you move through all that you're moving through... I wish for you:

  • spacious time
  • breathing space
  • (self-)compassion
  • loving connection
  • curiosity and awe
  • flow
  • and hugs (if you choose to accept, from me and from those physically near you).

Happenings while I've been writing this

(a newly added experimental section)

I began writing this note while in a virtual co-writing session with a fellow Foster.co contributor. I started considering what to write while I was eating a hungrily-made fried rice with frozen peas, an egg, chopped up sliced turkey, microwavable rice, coconut aminos and some sweet chili sauce. Yeah, it was a cooking-then-eating-then-co-writing session.

I wrote this on the porch with the early afternoon sun and blue skies filling my eyes. Ernest sleeping at my magenta Croc encased feet (one of the many pre-trip buys I was laughing at myself for though have found them to be incredibly comfortable as I move thru some foot issues).

One of the local ospreys soaring above sending out their loud call. A large family of quail chitter chatter down in the garden. Some not-yet-known-to-me creature croaking in the nearby trees (maybe a crow?).

<3

Til next time,

Cassandra

P.S. To continue these thoughts, another invitation to take a listen (Apple Podcasts and Spotify) to or a read of the latest podcast episode, Being with Reuniting Fresh Starts!

Full Transcript

Listen on Apple Podcasts

Listen on Spotify

As always, I'd love to know about what resonated with you – from the episode and from this note.